Heal Me, O Van Damme's Street Fighter
(To the tune of: Guide Me, O Thou Great Redeemer)
There's a nurse who's such a heartless blighter, earns death by wild beast, not gun!
She was rude about Van Damme's Street Fighter - just like mum and gran had done!
Even worse, she would be burned at the stake for when she caused me to grieve:
It was on a December 24th - yes you guessed right, Christmas Eve!
Carie Attree! Carie Attree!
Four years since dad's pheasant plucker (pheasant plucker)... "Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker!"
Such cold spite we can't stand any longer, how she made me bleed and groan!
Vega, Cammy, Guile and E Honda can't wait to cast the first stone!
They want to end all my pain and fear, have Christmas merry, and then
Now to only hope for Raul Julia to grace December again!
Jean-Claude Van Damme! Jean-Claude Van Damme!
Kick M Bison's ass so hard! (kick it so hard!)
Bring justice to me, for I've been scarred!
'Twas one thing, such heartless degradation, for such hurt from my bad past
To oft strike the Righteous Indignation - but Street Fighter, twice? Straw, last!
There is but one beautiful means to express hurt and grief at this spite:
All throughout the fair month of December, thou shalt dress in naught but WHITE!
Jay Tavare! Jay Tavare!
Let your beauty to us shine! (oh, let it shine!)
In December, make the red rose mine!