Ken: You sneaky bitches!! How did you even get his phone number?

Cammy: I traced it from your house.

Chun-Li: We kept our end of the bargain. Now, you owe us a favor.

Ken: Oh, man.

Cammy: I heard everything. You have to do this.

Ken: If you heard everything, then you know I can't go.

Chun-Li: I'm not asking you to live in the Himalayas with Ryu, I just need you to spend some quality time with him. Besides, isn't Eliza the reason you can't go? If you don't do this, she'll leave you.

Ken: I hate you. I really fuckin hate you, Chun-Li. I always have.

Chun-Li: And I hate you too. Now that we've gone through that for the 1'000th time, let's get down to business. When you get there, you have to go along with EVERYTHING he suggests, even sex.

Ken: What? I'm sick of these stupid gay jokes about Ryu and me. All you street fighters are jealous of our friendship.

Cammy: Cut the shit. We know about you two. Give it up.

Ken: If you were really listening, you know we're not gay.

Chun-Li: You told him you love him!! Ken: Like a brother I love him, yes.

Cammy: Besides that, we heard him talking dirty with Bison. Don't lie to us. We know ALL!!! (pulls a gun on Ken)

Ken: (raises his arms in the air) I swear I'm not lying!! There's nothing like that going on!!

Chun-Li: If you're not gay, then Ryu certainly is. And I think Bison's going that way as well.

Ken: The whole tournament is a bunch of homos!!!

Chun-Li: Well, I'm still straight.

Ken: Who cares about you? Nobody wants you anyway, man woman, or beast.

Chun-Li: (backhands Ken across his face) SHUT YOUR MOUTH, BARBIE!!! Plenty of men want me.

Ken: You look good, but then you start running your big mouth and it's a turnoff. A little duct tape on your pie hole and you'd be the perfect woman.

Chun-Li: That was almost a compliment. Things are just falling apart around here!! So, are you going to do it or will I have to tell Eliza about everything?

Cammy: Yea, and we'll tell her you're gay with Ryu, too!!

Ken: What if you're right about Ryu being like that? What if he wants to do stuff with me?

Chun-Li: Hey, whatever. As long as you get us our information, he can do whatever he wants.

Ken: Oh, man. I have no choice. I'll go.

Cammy: (rubs her hands together with excitement) this is priceless!! I want to watch!!

Ming: What about me?

Chun-Li: Hmmmmmmm, I guess you're coming with us.

Ming: I COULD stay here with Guy...

Cammy: Are you kidding? Guy will want to see this first-hand!!

Chun-Li: She's right. We might need him in case things get crazy.

Ming: Man, I just CAME from China!! Can't we go to Tahiti or the Bahamas or something?

Chun-Li: Ryu lives in China and that's where we're headed. I'll call and make arrangements.

Cammy: How are we going to get all the way up to the Himalayas?

Ken: There's only one way to get to Ryu's house. It's a long, winding dirt road.

Chun-Li: Cool, I can rent a jeep or something.

Ken: It's too narrow. It can only be traveled by foot.

Chun-Li: This is not my week.

**Chun-Li, Cammy, Guy, Ming, and a reluctant Ken boarded the next flight to China. Ken told Eliza that he was going to visit an old friend of the family and left a message on the front door of the office and on the answering machine saying that they were on vacation. They had each packed for 3 days, not knowing how long it would take. When they arrived at the airport, it was early morning. They took a cab and went as close to the foot of the mountain as possible. They began trekking up the small dirt path.**

Ming: This sucks!! How long is it going to take?

Ken: It'll be a while.

Chun-Li: Suck it up and keep going.

Ming: Everyone here is in great shape!! The most exercise I ever get is the walk from the couch to the bathroom and back again.

Cammy: It's good for you.

Ken: Wow, I haven't been up here in a long time!!

**The trip took all day. They had stopped once for lunch, then didn't stop until they reached the house, which was not until near sunset. Cammy and Ken had been in the lead, with Chun-Li and Guy were close behind and Ming was lagging at least 20 paces behind. The house was a large hut composed of rock and clay. The front door was a big, heavy, arch-shaped wooden door and was painted pink. There was a purple mailbox with the name "Ryu" on it and a floral welcome mat. The sign on the door read "no girls allowed". It was pretty.**

Guy: This is definitely the house of a gay man.

Chun-Li: This welcome mat is adorable!! I wonder where he got it!!

Cammy: He probably sewed it himself. I bet he watches Martha Stewart.

Chun-Li: Speaking of bets, I guess I owe you some cash.

Cammy: I can't wait!!

Chun-Li: Besides that, you're getting paid time and a half for this. I don't want any lip from either of you.

Guy: You know me. I never cause trouble.

Cammy: that's what makes you so boring.

Ming: He's not boring. He's just nice.

Guy: Thank you, Ming.

Ming: (blushes) Don't mention it.

Chun-Li: (looks at Ken) Well, go for it!!

Ken: (backs away from the bright pink door) I...I'm scared...what if he tries something?

Chun-Li: Sucks for you, doesn't it? I'm not allowed in there anyway. Look, it says right here.

Ken: (looks to Guy for help) Please?

Guy: No way. I'm just as scared as you are. I have no business in there.

Ken: (frowns) I don't wanna go!

Chun-Li: Everybody hide!!

**Everyone hid in the bushes, and when Ryu came to answer the door, Chun-Li kicked Ken in his ass, sending him flying toward the open door. Ryu stood wearing only a hot pink bathrobe and was smiling.**

Ryu: Well, looks like you weren't lying, Chun-Li!!

Chun-Li: I always keep my word.

**Cammy cannot control her laughter. Guy had to kick her to make her shut up.**

Ryu: (looks around) What was that? I thought you were alone!!

Chun-Li: We are. I think it was a squirrel. A short, ugly, annoying little bushy-tailed rodent who doesn't know how to control it's immature behavior...

**Cammy grits her teeth.**

Cammy: (whispers to Guy) Wait till he closes that door!! I'll murder that bloody whore!!

Ryu: Squirrels are so cute. I feed them when I see them. Maybe I'll put out a bowl of milk for the little critter.

Chun-Li: With a little rat poison for dessert.

**Cammy's face turns red**

Ryu: You're just as mean as ever, Chun-Li. I guess the right guy hasn't come along to pull that bug out of your ass.

Chun-Li: Just take your stupid friend out of my sight. I'll be back tomorrow for the information that I want.

Ryu: OK. (grabs Ken by his shirt and yanks him through his door, then lets go, sending him crashing to the floor behind him) It's been a pleasure doing business with you, Chun-Li. I won't let you down. (turns to face the trembling Ken and drops his robe, leaving him totally naked)

Ryu: And I won't let You down either, Ken! (closes the door behind him)

**Chun-Li met her friends in the bushes, where Cammy was waiting with an attack. After Cammy has hit Chun-Li a couple of times, they headed through the trees and off the path to a clearing where they could camp out without Ryu knowing where they were. Poor Ken would have a long night ahead of him.**