Chapter 2: Vega's Bullfight

At Vega's mansion, also known as Castle de Maria Isabelle, Vega wakes up on the cold floor in a hangover with a terrible headache along with aches and pains all over his body. Vega groans as he sits up to rub his ass and was very relieved to find no signs of blood.

Vega: At least I wasn't raped by Dan.... but where did this terrible headache come from? Could it be that Chun Li lightning kicked me in the head after I scored and got lucky with her?

The headache was because the spell that Sailor Pluto placed on Vega wore off. She changed her mind in playing match maker with everyone and just let Vega be. This meant that Vega is free to really be himself again and chase after the woman that he truly loves. Vega looked at the time on his wrist watch and frowns.

Vega: I am late for my early morning stalking and sexual harassment of Chun Li. I wonder if my beautiful Senorita Chun Li missed seeing the big joy in my pants when she opens up the window drapes to see me standing outside butt naked for her. Heh, heh, heh.

Vega had a bullfight coming up and he had lots to prepare for. Vega had to choose the right matador suit, the right speech, the right fighting move techniques to kill the ugly bull and of course the right perverted comments to harass Chun Li. Call it sadistical but Vega loved any form of attention and abuse that he could get from Chun Li.

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At a dimension that exists outside time and space, Sailor Pluto also known as Setsuna is crying over Ryu. Like all women in the city of Shadowlaw/Shadaloo she has a terrible infatuation and unhealthy crush over Ryu that makes them all go insane. Setsuna is holding photos of Ryu with closeups of the buldge in his pants and cries on her bed with her face buried in a pillow. She is feeling very sorry for herself at how alone and miserable she is without a man named Ryu.

Setsuna: I hate my life! I don't know how much longer I can go on being so lonely and Ryuless. Ryu is such a hot virgin with a real big piece of meat in his pants that he should be shared with all the women in the world.

A knock was heard outside the door and Kunzite opens the door to let himself in Setsuna's room to talk to her. Setsuna is angry to see him as she wants to be left alone.

Kunzite: Setsuna, you have got to stop this! Queen Beryl has called again and is demanding that you speak to her in person. She said something about tying up Tuxedo Mask/Endymion to a rack but when she came back with a whip he escaped.... You better talk to her before things get any worse.

Setsuna: Get out of my room!

Setsuna throws a pillow at Kunzite's face and out of her room. Kunzite shakes his head as he walks down to the kitchen. He sits down by the table to wait as he wonders why Shadowlaw/Shadaloo is so full of crazy and psychotic people. On the table was a newspaper. Kunzite picks up the newspaper and reads it until he was disgusted to read that it was nothing but horror rape stories from Dan's male victims who made the bad mistake of wearing something pink in public. For now Kunzite believes that it is safe for him to stay here at Setsuna's castle because being a virgin feminine man that shows some physical resemblance to Vega he is placed high up on the list on the menu for Dan when he is out hunting for fresh meat and this is the only place that is out of Dan's reach.

Setsuna: I almost forgot that I am having company over for tea time and you are not suppose to be here! I have to fix this in a way that Cammy won't be mad at me because this is strictly for women only.

Setsuna ran in to the room carrying two cantaloupe melons and a make up kit. Kunzite is confused at what was going on until Setsuna shoved the two melons down his shirt and put lipstick and eye shadow on his face. Kunzite was getting angry and starts to fight off the make over process.

Kunzite: You can't do this to me! I am the highest ranking general in Queen Beryl's Dark Kingdom army! This is demeaning!

Setsuna: Shut up and behave or else I will give you a drug so potent that you will balloon up and grow tits to look just like Rufus.

Kunzite: How dare you do this to me! I was once known as one of the four Kings in Queen Beryl's Dark Kingdom!

Setsuna: If you don't behave this instant I will make sure that you bleed more than your worse period.

Kunzite: MEN DON'T GET PERIODS!!!!

Setsuna: You will if Dan ever gets a hold of your virgin ass. Now do I make myself clear? You sit there, shut up and pretend that you are a woman. Understood?

Kunzite: ........................

With that Kunzite stopped struggling and sat down quietly back in the chair with his arms crossed. He had never been humiliated so much in his life but on the other hand he doesn't want to be killed by Dan. Nothing is worse than death by Dan. The door bell rang and Setsuna ran out of the kitchen to let her guests in to her home. She returns back to the kitchen table with Cammy and Sakura who stare at Kunzite strangely. Setsuna looks nervous as she talks to Cammy and Sakura.

Setsuna: This is.... Uhm.... Fagat.... She is Sagat's retarded sister that has just escaped from a mental asylum and is looking for a place to hide. She can't talk but she communicated to me in sign language by pointing to a picture of Ryu's crotch that she wants to join us for tea time to listen in on how wonderful and big Ryu is!

Kunzite: ........................

Sakura and Cammy sit down on empty chairs as Setsuna sighs in relief and sits down next to Kunzite. She could see him clenching his fists in anger. Sakura bursts in to tears and throws a temper tantrum.

Sakura: I can't take it any more. I want Ryu's virginity and I want Ryu now!

Cammy: Don't we all, dear. I feel all wet and soggy just thinking about Ryu's member.

Sakura: If only there could be a way to break up Ryu and Chun Li apart. But how? What is their weakness?

Cammy: I think Ryu and Chun Li are just friends. Ryu has no romantic interest in Chun Li while Chun Li is following him around like a dog.

Setsuna: Chun Li actually does have a weakness....

Sakura: SAY IT NOW!!!!

Setsuna: It is Vega. Chun Li's weakness is Vega.

Cammy: Are you saying that Chun Li actually likes that sick, psycho pervert that constantly stalks her?

Sakura: Hmmmm..... Now how can I use that to my advantage?

Cammy: Setsuna, I've been meaning to tell you this for a long time but how did you get dark green highlights in your hair?

Setsuna: I don't know. I was actually born with natural highlights.

Sakura: Get rid of them!

Setsuna: Why?

Sakura: It makes you look like a cheap prostitute! If you were to run in to Abel at nights looking like that you would be in big trouble!

Cammy: What is wrong with Abel? I love him because he is generous with the tips.

Setsuna: I'll dye my hair later on tonight then.

Cammy: So... How are you adjusting to life in Shadaloo? Did you manage to give any cute men there my business card?

Setsuna: It is okay but sometimes I miss seeing my good friend Small Lady.

Cammy slaps Setsuna across the face very hard to knock her face around. Setsuna rubs her painful face and looks at Cammy as to what was that for?

Cammy: Idiot! What have I told you before? Any adult that hangs around children all the time and is too nice to them can be arrested and called a pedophile!

Sakura: Do you, ladies, know what day is coming up soon? Dan's birthday. How about we do something different this year. How about a little competition. Let's make a bet on who can give the best birthday gift for Dan. The winner gets a free year's supply of yaoi porn courtesy of Liu Kang and Fei Long. Liu Kang looks very much like Ryu if you ask me.

Setsuna, Cammy and Sakura all shake hands to accept the challenge. As Setsuna took Cammy and Sakura outside the door so they can all go home, Kunzite was left alone. He angrily pulled out the melons from out of his shirt and wiped the make up off his face. Kunzite can't imagine things to get any worse and as he walks out of the kitchen a cage magically appeared and traps him in it.

Kunzite: What is going on here?

Setsuna: You are the one that will help me win this bet! You are going to be Dan's birthday gift. You are going to be the new Vega.

Kunzite: WHAAAATTTTT?!?!?!?!

Setsuna: You are to be fed a strict diet of squid and sangria because those are Vega's favorite foods.

Kunzite: THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING TO ME!!!!!

Kunzite runs around inside the cage, trying to find a way to exit but sadly for him there was no way out. Setsuna throws a book inside the cage about how to learn Spanish.

Setsuna: First off I have to change the way you talk.

Kunzite: What is wrong with the way I talk? I always try to speak like a true gentleman.

Setsuna: That is not what I meant. You need to speak with a thick Spanish accent because that will be very charming for Dan. Si?

Setsuna throws huge barbells and weight lifting equipment inside the cage.

Setsuna: You are too scrawny and muscleless. You need to get buffed to make Dan smile! Now start pumping iron and working out while I find a lethal dose of steroids to inject you with. Remember the closer you can get to having the perfect manly 'Vega' body for Dan the less surgery you will need!

Kunzite: Let me go! You are insane!

Setsuna: The only way that you will escape from here is when you truly are Vega and in Dan's Saikyo Dojo as fresh meat with the Gadouken up your virgin ass.

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At the bullfighting arena, the crowd is restless as they wait for the show to begin. The door swings open and Vega slowly walks to the center of the stadium with a rose in his mouth and holding a matador sword that was wrapped around with a red silk cloth. Vega glances at the crowd to see who was in the audience. He smiles as he saw Chun Li and walks over to her.

Vega: I knew that you would come to the show. A rose for my beautiful Senorita Chun Li.

Vega gives Chun Li the rose whom she accepts with a smile. Chun Li holds the rose and smells it but her smile quickly faded away as she noticed Vega looking over her and trying to look down her top.

Chun Li: What are you looking at, you pervert?

Vega chuckles and then walks away to begin the fight. The bull was released and as soon as it sees Vega it charges like an angry rabid monster. Vega effortlessly dodges at the last second. The bull charges again and Vega dodges again to let the wind blow through his hair. The crowd cheers. Vega waves his hand at Chun Li but Chun Li turns her head away and ignores him.

Chun Li: Sick, disgusting pervert.... I hope the bull gores him....

Chun Li may soon regret those words as the entire crowd becomes silent. Vega gives a blood curdling scream as he was thrown in the air and hit the pavement with a loud crack. When Vega was distracted in flirting with Chun Li, the bull had the chance to stab its two horns in Vega's back, breaking a few of his rib bones. Chun Li looks in horror as she sees Vega lying on the ground and bleeding in a pool of blood that was growing by the minute.

Vega: Good... Good bye, Chun Li....

The bull turns around to charge at Vega again but before the bull could get close to trampling over Vega, Chun Li used her gun and shot the bull dead in the head.

Balrog: Ha, ha!

Chun Li: THAT'S NOT FUNNY!!!

Chun Li fires her gun at Balrog, shooting him in the gut. Balrog drops down to the ground screaming in pain as Chun Li puts her gun away. Chun Li runs pass the crowd as she goes to where Vega was.

Chun Li: Vega, don't you dare die, you sick bastard...

Chun Li drops to her knees and hugs Vega tightly against her chest as she begins to cry. Chun Li did have feelings for Vega and as much as she hate to admit it she could not go on living without Vega if he died especially if it was her fault. As Chun Li continued to cry, Vega, who was indeed in a lot of pain, kept his eyes closed and enjoyed the attention from Chun Li. He especially enjoyed feeling Chun Li's breasts and warm body pressed up so closely to his and he fought hard not to have a boner. Chun Li waited for the ambulance and medical staff to arrive as she would go with Vega to the hospital and sit next to his bedside until he recovers.

Sakura: Tsk, tsk, tsk. Chun Li is such a slut.  I thought that she was dating you, Ryu? You know that I would never betray your love and trust. Chun Li is a trecherous post menopausal bitch that can't give you what you want. I, on the other hand, can't wait to have your babies!

Ryu was looking in the audience and he was not very happy. Sakura grabs his arm and giggles with delight. Sakura knew that she was now closer than ever in winning Ryu over.

Ryu: Enough, Sakura, it is time to train for the next fight. I have told Chun Li and all the other women in the world that I have no interest in them unless they are here to fight me in a tournament. I only care about the fight and becoming a stronger warrior. I have no time in my life for any thing else. The fight is the only thing that matters to me.