Prologue: Fear Dan Hibiki


[Dan is looking for his Vega. He sniffs the air trying to catch a whiff of Vega's scent because he lost his contact lenses and was unable to see clearly. Dan bumped in to Cody and thinking that he was Vega, Dan gives him the Saikyo drill.]

Dan: Is that you, Vega, my love?

Cody: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Ken: Ha ha ha! It's funny because it is not me!

[Dan caught another scent and it got him all excited as Dan gaily chased after the smell to where Ken was.]

Dan: Will you be my Vega?

Ken: No! Why don't you just go fuck yourself with a vacuum cleaner on high and die.

Dan: Oh, Vega, I like it when you talk dirty to Dan!

Ken: I am not Vega, you blind faggot!

[Dan tries to give Ken a hug but Ken retaliated by kicking and punching Dan hard in his face. Dan did not seem to be affected by any of Ken's blows but instead gets more turned on.]

Dan: My turn! GADOUKEN!

[Ken got thrown down but quickly rolled out of the way and jumped to his feet, seconds after Dan hit the ground from trying to pounce on him. Ken was now getting afraid and wished that he was back home in his warm safe house with Cammy.]

Ken: Look at me! I don't have long blond hair, at least not anymore. I don't have a claw or mask. I am not covered with a snake tattoo. I don't yodel. I am not a Spanish ninja. I am not Vega!

Dan: VEGA! I'm going to shove you up my ass just like old times. Now come closer and give your Dan a big kissy.

Ken: I have no choice. I must concentrate my chi energy to summon a flaming dragon, a new shoryuken technique that I've been working on for the next time I fight Ryu.

[Ken turns his flaming dragon punch in to a real fire dragon but when it appeared Dan wasn't afraid. Dan squinted his eyes and thinks that the dragon is a big Vega wearing a leather suit. Dan gets really excited and starts doing an early Saikyo mating dance.]

Dan: A Vega in leather embracing his homosexuality! Dan is so happy!

[Dan hugs the dragon so tightly, with happy tears streaming down his eyes, that the dragon's eyes popped out and its head exploded.]

Dan: ROSHAAAAAA!!!!!!

[Dan Saikyo drills the dragon to a pile of blood, guts, ashes and scales.]

Dan: MORE VEGAS! WANT VIRGIN VEGA NEXT!

Ken: Stay back.... Stay away from me, you fucking sick monster and I am definitely not a virgin! Cammy can prove that!. Where is the real Vega? I've learned my lesson! I want to go home!

[The real Vega is in the hospital unconscious and hooked up to life support as he is being prepared for emergency surgery to repair his ass thanks to Dan's over loving.]

Dan: Don't run from Dan! I just want to taste your virgin ass!

[Dan chases Ken to the edge of a cliff. Ken looks down to see jagged rocks and rushing water. Ken looks back to see Dan approaching closer. Ken would rather die than to stay here with Dan so he jumps off the cliff and is swept away by the raging waters.]

Dan: I lose more Vegas that way.....